


Trying to Catch Your Eye

by midoriverte



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Hideweek, M/M, day 3: green, hideweek2016, lots of negative thoughts in this in case that makes people uncomfortable, this is tagged as hidekane but it's mostly hide being jealous about kaneki liking rize
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-25
Updated: 2016-08-25
Packaged: 2018-08-10 22:12:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7863091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/midoriverte/pseuds/midoriverte
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Day 3: Green </p>
<p>Green: The colour of envy</p>
            </blockquote>





	Trying to Catch Your Eye

**Author's Note:**

> I have... no idea why this was my first thought for the prompt "green".

“ _She’s way out of your league_!” Hide heard himself say.

Kaneki sputtered indignantly as Hide fought to show no outward sign of the panic rising within him. He knew, had always known, that one day Kaneki would find someone that wasn’t him. And he hated himself for telling Kaneki to give up before he even tried, but Hide almost couldn’t bear to look at the woman that had caught Kaneki’s eye.

She was beautiful. Long, dark, silky hair cascaded down her back. She moved in a way that suggested every movement was calculated to be perfect, but never enough to make it feel forced. It was what Hide supposed you could call grace, or elegance. She didn’t draw attention, instead it seemed only natural that attention be paid to her.

Hide knew he was reading too much into her. He should stop. He didn’t know this woman. He didn’t want to know this woman.

But he couldn’t make himself stop, his mind racing to even more conclusions that he couldn’t stop from forming even if he tried.

“ _I bet if you took her glasses off she’d be a completely different person_.”

_Stop_ , he begged himself.

She seemed intelligent. She had a quietness about her, a sharpness in her eyes that suggested she was observant and cunning.

Hide got the sense that she, like him, was hiding behind a mask.

And yet Hide sensed no fear in her. She seemed to be comfortable in her disguise, maybe she even revelled in it.

He felt a sick stab of envy. Every word he said, every piece of clothing he wore, every time he dyed his hair and wore a fake smile, they were all calculated to make sure no one ever, ever knew what he was.

Hollow. Empty. He didn’t even know himself anymore. He just knew that he was afraid of anyone else finding out. That someone would lift the cover of a well only to find out that it had run dry years ago.

Kaneki was blushing and smiling slightly at the thought of this woman and Hide wanted to scream.

She was everything he could never be

Beautiful. Comfortable. Graceful.

Beautiful.

_I have to go to work_ , he lied.

He knew he was being ridiculous. He knew that he was projecting a million things onto some poor girl who had just happened to catch his best friend’s ( _his everthing’s_ ) eye.

And yet he could have sworn, as opened the door and turned around to wave goodbye one last time, that she looked at him.

And she smiled at him, knowing and malicious.

And Hide got onto his bike. Turning the pedals faster and faster and with each turn asking himself

_What’s wrong with me_

_What’s wrong with me_

_What-_

He clenched his jaw tight as he rode at a dangerous speed, oblivious to where he was going and apologizing to Kaneki in his head, for what had to be the thousandth time, that he had had the misfortune to become friends with someone like himself. Someone so desperate and disgusting and jealous.

But he still wished that Kaneki would look at him like he had looked at her.


End file.
